Fails of the Week: Beyonce’s Super Bowl Halftime Meme, The “Martin” Porn Parody & More Posted by Nathan S. on 02/08/13 | Filed under Fails of the Week, Humor, Fails

The dictionary defines "Schadenfreude" as pleasure derived from the misfortunes of others. In that case, we're about to get Schadenfreude like a motherfucker up in this bitch. For the latest edition of "Fails of the Week" (aka your favorite running column that doesn't involve random hot girls) I tackle the Beyonce Super Bowl meme phenomenon, the "Martin" porn parody and much more.

Enjoy...

Beyonce vs. The Internet, The Internet Wins


So here's the thing about the internet, the internet always wins. So after her frankly bad ass Super Bowl performance Beyonce had to be happy with all the positive media coverage, but her publicist wasn't super happy with some of the photos that Gawker posted:

"Thanks for taking my call. As discussed, there are some unflattering photos on your current feed that we are respectfully asking you to change. I am certain that you will be able to find some better photos. The worst are #5, 6, 10, 11, 12, 19 and 22. Thank you very much.”

In response Gawker (obviously) posted the message, and the interwebs launched a spontaneous "who can make the craziest Beyonce pic?" Photoshop contest. Now in her defense that publicist was about as cool as she could have possibly been about it, but this is the interwebs; once shit's out there it's out there, and attempting to remove it will only make shit worse.

The "Martin" Porn Parody You Never Wanted Is Here


Terrible porn parodies are kind of becoming a whole thing, so I really can't be surprised that there's now a takeoff on the classic comedy "Martin". What I am a little surprised about though is that there's literally no one in this video who's remotely attractive. Isn't the entire point of porn sex, even if it's a parody? I would rather have sex with the actual cast of "Martin".

I guess they can't all be as good as "Spongebob Squarenuts".

Game Needs To Up His Tattoo Game


There's nothing inherently fail-y about Game getting "The Chronic" and "The Documentary" covers tattooed on his torso. That shit makes sense, and a lot more sense than a butterfly on your face.

But are you looking at this shit? Who did these tattoos? A drunk Michael J. Fox? Dr. Dre looks like he just got punched in the face by Tyson, and his son didn't fare much better. I'm always so confused when celebrities get bad tattoos. They got enough money to pay the best artists in the world, and they usually just end up looking like this guy.

This Week in Random Rap Terribleness


It's either the best thing I've seen all week, or the worst, and I don't think there's a middle ground. At the moment I'm leaning worst; I might feel differently if I was tripping balls.

Fail Update: French Montana's upcoming album, the one that will be the "best album of the decade"? Yeah, that shit's not coming out anytime soon.

In Case You Missed It:

* From Harbaugh to Weezy, The Worst of Super Bowl XLVII
* Chris Brown Definitely (Allegedly) Faked His Community Service Hours

The Best of the Rest:

* ‘Multiple Fingers’ Severed During High School Game of Tug-of-War
* Lady Gaga’s Tour Rider: Poop Yogurt, Chardonnay, and a Mannequin with ‘Puffy Pink’ Pubes
* North Korea Threatens To Nuke US With Copied Video Game Footage
* Send This Video to All the People In Your Life Who Are Panic-Buying Bread and Milk Right Now Because of Some Snow

See Also:  Fails of the Week: The Worst Nude Kim Kardashian Pic Ever, Foul Balls & More